A mom's grief

I caught today's Good Morning America and was especially touched by an interview with the family of gospel singer Steven Curtis Chapman.

On May 21, his five-year-old adopted daughter Maria was accidentally stuck by the SUV her 17-year-old brother was driving. She ran into the truck's path on the way to greet her brother who was coming up the family driveway. The little girl died later that day.

As a mother of two young girls, I know that's every family's worst nightmare. How in the world do you bounce back from that kind of tragedy? It was obvious that they're still struggling with many unanswered questions themselves.

I think the thing that really got me was wife Mary Beth's reaction. Here's an excerpt of her reaction from the GMA website:

"I've said, you know, somewhat coldly, 'I don't care whose lives are touched by this story and whose lives are changed or what good comes of it.' As the heart of a mom, I want Maria back."

Crying, she continued, "And that's -- you know, that's what I want people to know is I want Maria back. But because I know that she is completely whole because of my faith, I know that she's completely whole and completely OK and I'm going to see her again. As a mom, I have to shift that grief to go."

I've got to say that raw emotion really got to me because it was real and honest. I hope and pray to God that my kids make it through each day happy, healthy and safe, but none of us can predict with any certainty that will happen. These moments that we have with our children and few and precious, and who knows who are what can happen that will take those moments away from us. I think any mom who watched that interview this morning can totally relate to how this woman feels. I know that we hope that we will never have to endure that kind of pain. I guess at the heart of all this grief is faith. Faith that we will see our loved ones again. Faith that we will get through. So while it wasn't her intention for the viewers to really take anything from her words, I did. I'll learn to appreciate those little moments that I have with my children. Not to get upset over the little things. Enjoy each happy smile. Each moment of silliness. Thanks for making me realize how truly fortunate I am.

To see the video for Chapman's beautiful song Cinderella, click here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcNPGWgbIbo

Missing the dog

About a month ago, our family dog passed away. It was a hard loss for all of us - she'd been with the family for almost 13 years. My oldest daughter and the dog had a love-hate relationship for the first few years of my daughter's life. You see, she saw the dog as a threat to her food supply. That dog would plant herself right by my daughter's chair and see what tasty morsels she would drop from the table at dinner. And even though my daughter is almost in second grade, she's still a pretty messy eater.



Well, when the dog passed the two of us cried - a lot. My daughter asked her dad and me to do her a favor after that first day. We agreed not to talk about the dog until she was ready to. It just made her too sad. So that's what we did.



The other night my daughter and I were coming back from a program at the local library on wild animals that had been rescued. Somehow we got on the subject of the dog and before long the tears started to flow. I reminded my daughter that our dog was in a better place and maybe it was best to think of happy memories or what she would be doing in Heaven right now. She was having a hard time, so I offered my thoughts.



`You know that she's up in Heaven right now chewing on the biggest chew bone ever because in Heaven they only have really big chew bones. And you know Jesus is probably yelling at her, and saying `Geez! Cookie tooted.' And I'll bet it's such a horrible toot that it's making Jesus' eyes water.'

Well, we both started laughing so hard, our eyes were watering. I'm just glad we were able to turn sad memories into happy ones.